Friday, February 20, 2009

Defining Moments

Have you ever had one of those moments when you realized your whole world had shifted? A moment that made you re-define yourself? One which meant you'd never be the same thereafter?

I've had a few of those in my life. But none stands out more vividly then that first defining moment when I realized I was really and truly a mom.

Now you might think this was a typical moment, like seeing the ultrasound or having my first baby placed in my arms for the very first time. But you'd be mistaken. It was nothing as sweet and sentimental as that.

Don't get me wrong, I loved being a mom from the instant Isabelle was first placed in my arms, and even before that. I had dreamt of being a mom for so long. And I enjoyed it so much. But even through all the nursing difficulties and middle of the night feedings, I still felt like I didn't fully get it. I just didn't know what it felt like to be a mom.

Then one day, when Isabelle was about 9 months old, I was feeding her lunch in her exersaucer. (She was a picky eater as a baby and need entertainment to convince her to eat.) I was sitting on the edge of our coffee table - a coffee table with a glass center. I scooted back just a little too far and fell right through the glass. (Please go ahead and laugh. I did!)

Instantly I jumped up to check on Isabelle. I carefully moved her from the exersaucer to her car seat. She was fine and none of the broken glass had touched her. So I started cleaning up. I pulled out the vacuum and the garbage can and made sure I got every last little piece of glass. I bet I vacuumed the same small space at least 100 times because I didn't want to miss anything.

Once I was positive there was no glass Isabelle could get into anywhere, I finished feeding her lunch. Then I put her down for a nap. Shortly after that, I noticed that my shirt felt like it was sticking to my back. I reached behind me to un-stick it and realized I was bleeding. And bleeding a lot too. I looked in the mirror and saw a gaping cut that extended about 4 inches above the waistband of my jeans.

It was then, in that exact moment, that I realized I finally knew what it felt like to be a mom.

Eight stitches later, I was as good as new, except I was a different new. I was now officially a mom and I would never be the same again.

So how about you...does your motherhood have a defining moment? What about other defining moments? I'd love to hear about them!


Amy @ Finer Things 10:59 PM  

Good grief! I learn something new about you all the time.

Omah's Helping Hands 12:00 AM  

Wow Kate! I can't think of anything off the top of my head. That is quite an ordeal. It just goes to show what a mom will do to protect her child. Thank heavens you were alright. Thanks for sharing. What a great mom you are!

Sandi 1:14 AM  

Wow, mine wasn't anything as dramatic as that. I remember the first time I went out in public when my girl was a week old I was at my husband's college graduation and my baby suddenly needed to eat. I tried to find a secluded place to feed her (there was none) and finally ended up doing it in a bathroom stall. I felt so inept, so unprepared, like a young, unwed, teenage mom (I was 28).

I guess I finally started to feel like a mom when I could predict what type of a diaper it would be (wet or stinky) by what time of day it was, and when I could catch her Cheerios in mid-air as she was throwing them off her high chair tray. I know that my mom always seemed to have eyes in the back of her head and the supernatural ability to read my mind. Now I know how she did it!

Sarah 5:47 PM  

I suppose often in the midst of chaos when both kids are crying, the house looks like a pack of wild billy goats has come through and dinner is boiling over, I stand in the middle and laugh (perhaps to keep from crying) and think this is my life! I am a mom

Jennifer 6:32 PM  

that is a pretty scary defining moment. Wow! Glad you are all right.

A defining moment for me, came about a year into my marriage. I was working and was suddenly in a very dangerous situation, I feared for my life. My first thought was "what if I never see Kevin again?" I wasn't worried about me, or my parents, but seeing Kevin again. I guess that is true love.

~Sara 7:02 PM  

This is a great post. I really enjoy reading your blog.

I left you an award on my blog if you have time to check.

Thank you for being so inspiring.

Elizabeth 8:46 PM  

What a beautiful post! Thank you for sharing. To put your child above you so easily without thought---to worry about her safety and not yours. It's one of those amazing, selfless gifts God has given us!

Elizabeth 8:52 PM  

Oh, and I wanted to share my defining moment into motherhood...

I loved being a mom right away but I didn't really understand what it meant to BE one for quite awhile. Zack was almost 3 when we got his autism diagnosis. In an instant, my life changed. I found myself on a mission to recover my son. My whole world started revolving around him because I knew deep within my heart that I was his greatest advocate. I was his best ally. I was his soft place to fall when the world was harsh. I was his mom.

Mezamashii 2:27 AM  

This is really neat.

Christina 6:17 PM  

i'd say I've had defining moments all along: hearing the Baby's heartbeat, seeing baby on ultrasound, holding my little man for the first time... But one of the most vivid and strong defining moments of motherhood has happened recently. I did something I never do: I went into Little Man's room, picked him up, and held him as he slept. I began to cry a little as I realized that the sweetly sleeping boy was my own small son, that I had such a huge responsibility to teach and train him, that I loved him with a love so strong it's indescribable, and that I would never have this same moment again. It's kinda hard to explain...

rainbowcreek 1:50 AM  

What a sweet post. Thank goodness you and the baby were fine, but I know that had to be pretty painful once the reality of it set in!

I am mom of 3 and grandmom of 5 so I have experienced many of those defining moments. The most recent was yesterday when my daughter announced to us that we are going to have another precious grandbaby. This was a wonderful surprise to us but she has a 3 year old and a not quite 1 year old and needless to say she was feeling a bit shell shocked by the news. I have to admit that I was thinking that this is just an awful time of uncertainty with the economic crisis and I was a bit scared for them.

But then I remembered that when she was only 6 months old I found out that I was expecting her brother and it seemed like the end of the world to me. Until my husband told me that he never wanted two kids, three was much better than two. And it turned out that hubby was right, and her little brother is still her best friend in the world. So I hugged her and told her that this is her defining moment as a mom, she can handle it and we can celebrate this new little person coming into our lives. We laughed alot and I know she feels better. That is what being a mom is all about for me. Endless love.

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