Friday, July 18, 2008

Being A Joyful Wife

Ever since I posted about trying to be more joyful, I've really been examining all the areas of my life that could use a bit more joy from me. Of course my ultimate goal is to just be a more joyful person overall. But sometimes it really helps if I can break things down into categories and tackle each area individually. I am not good at just going after the big picture. I get overwhelmed too easily. So, I've broken it down into four categories:

  1. To be a more joyful child of my Father. To find ways to have a quiet time alone with Him each day that are full of joy.
  2. To be a more joyful wife and to take the time daily to rejoice in the wonderful man I am married.
  3. To be a more joyful mother. To push aside frustrations or annoyances and really find the joy in more children, and to help them see the joy that is all around them.
  4. To be a more joyful homemaker. There is joy to be found in folding laundry, washing dishes, and cleaning toilets, and I am bound and determined to find it.

I really believe that being a joyful wife is so important to the overall happiness of my marriage. I know it is not always possible though. After all, I am not perfect, nor is my husband. There will always be disagreements and bad days. And that's fine. But what I am concerned with is all those other times - the ordinary, just living our life, times.

Whenever I read through the book of Proverbs, I am amazed at how many mentions are made of a "quarrelsome" wife. For some reason, those verses always strike a chord with me. I am not one to ever go looking for a fight, so I really don't believe I fit the term. But I believe the term, used in this context, goes beyond just a wife who likes to nag and pick fights. Another word used through Proverbs is "ill-tempered." I definitely see that in myself at times. So, I am convinced that infinite wisdom of God's word is showing me to not act in any way that would make my husband find sleeping on the roof to be a better situation than sharing a home with me.

This is where being joyful really comes in for me. I want my husband to see and hear and feel the extent of joy that I take from being his wife. It really is a wonderful position, and he really is a remarkable man who was absolutely my gift from God.

I am trying to think of things that will show my joy to and for my husband at all times. Any suggestions from anyone? What are some ways that you display joy in and for your husband? I really would love to hear about it.

Instead of worrying about what I do NOT want to do, maybe it might be better to focus on what I DO want to do. I want to be the "good" in my husband's life every single day.

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from
the LORD. ~ Prov. 18:22


5intow 10:22 PM  

God has been speaking to me also recently on the topic of 'joy.' I am working my way through every verse in the Bible with the word joy, joyful, or joyous in them. It is amazing how much there is to say about it. I commented on my blog sometime recently that often the joy is really anchored in our future hope. If we keep our eyes up, we can walk with joy. I used to think of it as an emotion, but it is really a choice of focus.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I know I need to continue to cultivate joy in my life and home, especially as a mom.

April in CT 11:16 PM  

You may be able to find joy in laundry by reading this. My mother in law just sent it to me right before I read your post! (sorry for the length of it, but it certainly helps put things in perspective)


Never thought of a 'washer' in this light
before..what a blessing!
'Washing Clothes Recipe' -- imagine having a recipe
for this ! ! !

Years ago an Alabama grandmother gave the new bride the
following recipe:
I can only imagine a young bride who said to her grandma
she didn't know how to wash clothes and perhaps she
just wrote it down for her.

This is an exact copy as written and found in an old
scrapbook - with spelling errors and all.


Build a fire in backyard to heat kettle of rain water. Set
tubs so smoke wont blow in eyes if wind is pert. Shave one
hole cake of lie soap in boilin water.

Sort things, make 3 piles
1 pile a white,
1 pile a colored,
1 pile a work britches and rags.

To make starch, stir flour in cool water to smooth,
then thin down with boiling water.
Take white things, rub dirty spots on board, scrub
hard, and boil, then rub colored don't boil just wrench
and starch.
Take things out of kettle with broom stick handle,
then wrench, and starch.
Hang old rags on fence.
Spread tea towels on grass.
Pore wrench water in flower bed. Scrub porch with
hot soapy water. Turn tubs upside down.
Go put on clean dress, smooth hair with hair combs.
Brew cup of tea, sit and rock a spell and count your
============ ========= ========= ========Paste this over
your washer and dryer Next time
when you think things are bleak, read it again, kiss that
washing machine and dryer, and give thanks. First thing
each morning you should run and hug your washer and
dryer, also your toilet---those two-holers used to get
mighty cold!
{For you non-southerners -wrench means rinse.}


Michele 12:36 AM  

Kate, this is so good! Thanks. I'll definitely be mulling this over during the weekend. :)

Michele :)

Nancy 8:03 AM  

A biggie at our house is the way I great Lawman when he gets home. If I stop whatever I'm doing and give him a proper greeting (including a hug & kiss), it speaks volumes. Same goes for the way the kids greet him. This shows that he's important enough to each of us that we can stop whatever we're doing just for him. (We try to do this for all of us, no matter which one of us is walking in the door.)

Dani 5:24 PM  

Great post. I have also been mulling over the concept of joy. I have so many people around me who nag and complain. I don't think I am that person, but I want to be joyful, happy and content.

Michele 12:41 AM  

This has been coming up in our conversation all day. Still mulling over this. Thanks! :)

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